regarding education (ie long, winded post of stuff you probably dont care about)

first: yesterday a sweet 11 miles. 7.7 post rain (it was beautiful out!!), a 40 minute "rock out" break with mt 4 year old "nephew", and then a 3.3 mile loop that lead me through what used to be church central, but is now immigrant central since they shut down all the catholic churches. lots of "damn, girls" were to be had on the second loop, quite the motivation.

my thoughts were centered on teaching and my career (and the rest of my life, pretty much) today. this was the result of 2 catalysts.
1. a boy was shot in dorchester this morning on his way to school (he is going to live, but what an absolute fucking tragedy...these stories drive me crazy. how can these things happen?!). watching the news, as they interviewed kids in the neighborhood, i realized how much i really, really enjoyed working in an inner city school. its hard to explain how i could fit in, but i feel like it was my niche. as cliche as it sounds, i really was trying to "make a difference" in these kids lives. show them options, take them to colleges, give them possibilities.
2. i got a phone call from someone i worked with last year, completely out of the blue. she has since moved on, not by her choice either, and was checking in. she clarified some things about what happened with my job among others.

and it was good timing, her call. id been mulling over the idea of not going back to teaching. i figured, if they didnt hire me back, its probably because i suck as a teacher. i did as much as i could while i was there, met some really awesome kids, had the experience and now im done.
just starting there took more courage than i even thought i had. i went into that job, arguably one of more unwanted jobs in the state education-wise, with no classroom experience...ever. i had substituted for 5 days in a suburb and that was it. no student teaching no lesson planning. and last september i walked in and started teaching, only getting the job thanks to the confidence of a friend (thank you, TS).

facing that initial fear of the unknown was worth it alone. but man, i LOVED it. i still do.

so my point is this. i may have gotten discouraged but after some thinking i realized that teaching, specifically at an urban school, is what i want to do...for my career.




but as i tell myself (and everyone else) often, things happen for a reason. i have wanted to go to massage school for a long time, and me not getting the job and the opportunity arising is all too perfect, how can i not think it is fate?
so i am VERYVERY excited to make the goal of getting certified. and open that door. and to get back into teaching. and math. I MISS MATH!